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How Astrology Helped Me Find My True Purpose : The Power of The North Node
Dive deep into the world of astrological self-discovery to uncover your true purpose, overcome challenges, and position yourself for personal growth and fulfillment.
If the question "What is my purpose?" has kept you up at night - you're not alone! I spent many wasted hours in my 20s and 30s asking myself the same thing pretty much every night, while staring at my ceiling as if the answer would magically appear. While I never got the answer there, one of the things that has helped me so much has been diving into my astrological birth chart - specifically my North and South Nodes.
image from Pinterest
Navigating life often leaves many of us questioning our purpose and seeking deeper insight into our personal journeys. As I encountered my own personal existential crisis, questioning my purpose, my path, and what I was supposed to be doing out here in this dumpster fire, I ended up using astrology to deep dive and understand myself better.
In my era of “self-exploration and self-understanding,” astrology provided a unique perspective, particularly through the study of the North and South Nodes. There was a lot of transformative potential in understanding these astrological points, and finally, I was able to get some actionable steps towards “figuring out a purpose.”
Now if I've already lost you - don't worry...I made a video explaining everything (scroll down for it below). And since I love to be extra, I took it a step further and recently hosted a workshop showing some of my followers and friends how to figure it all out by themselves. But don't worry about that right now - If you're feeling stuck or just curious about how astrology might help you in your personal growth, keep reading and then take a look at the video.
All About The North and South Nodes Explained
image from Pinterest
In astrology, your birth chart is more than just the placements of the sun, moon, and planets at the time of your birth—it also includes crucial points like the North and South Nodes. The North Node indicates your direction in this life, what you're striving towards (what might not be easy for you but will pay off and be “worth it” in the long run). While the South Node reveals traits and skills from “past lives” (and if you’re not into that cool, forget I said past lives), it also means your early years (a lot of the stuff in your personal foundation - that also comes easy to you). The South Node offers comfort and sometimes the “easy route” but also can be a trap of complacency, pride, ego, rebellion, or fear just to name a few… well, those are mine that I just named, haha.
So How Do You Find Your Node?
image from Pinterest
You can easily find your personal nodes by looking up your natal chart online using your birth date, time, and location. Understanding where your North Node lies in terms of zodiac sign and house can reveal your desires (maybe the stuff you already know but are afraid to say out loud) and the life areas requiring your focus. While your South Node can illustrate inherent talents and persistent patterns that might be holding you back. These talents can also be important in you stepping into the “destiny” of the North node - you just might need to look at them through a different lens or from a different perspective (that’s what I needed) in order to best utilize them in your current situation and the present.
How I Figured Out How To Use My North Node
image from Pinterest
Well, research, YouTube, and reading - also I decided to look up celebrities who had similar placements as me. Taking cues from public figures like Beyoncé, who embodies her Leo North Node through her commanding stage presence, attention to details, embodying “being an artist” in all areas, and community-building efforts. She inspired her fans to embrace their own personal greatness even if they are not center stage. She also uses her past personal experiences in her artistic expression and creations. We are both Leo North Nodes so stepping into roles that require leadership and visibility are part of the process instead of hiding out behind the scenes or “in the group”. As well as infusing your journey into your art in order to share it with other people so they can then have their own personal inspiration and takeaway.
My North Node placement is about embracing visibility and sharing my perspective, a big contrast to her South Node where comfort was found in being in the background (I was a BTS photographer for years & all my friends are in the spotlight as comedians). My North Node challenged me to stretch beyond my comfort zones, while the South Node helped me see how to not fallback to overused strengths.
But Let’s Not Forget About The South Node…Okay?
While it's crucial to embrace your North Node challenges in order to grow and evolve, totally ignoring your South Node skills is not a good idea. We aren’t trying to abandon the South Node - we are trying to incorporate it more. Your abilities and skills belong in your life toolbox to help navigate towards your North Node. You need to figure out how they can support your journey rather than restrain it or “contain” you. Balancing these aspects involves integrating past knowledge and looking at how we can take where we are comfortable into new areas of growth.
Implementing Through Introspection
For me, I started asking myself a ton of questions about the Node Placements (don’t worry I’m sharing them in the video to help you out too). I would journal, meditate, and have some self-introspection and reflection about how these things were showing up for me. Where was I resisting my North Node? Where was I leaning into comfort or “what comes easy to me?” What happened when I got uncomfortable? Was there success or did it backfire? I also needed action. Because we can sit and ponder and write our feelings and make tons of vision boards about what we want, but we also need action. Every small step towards embracing this energy contributes to your personal evolution, growth, and overall life satisfaction. I am a testament to that.
Journaling Prompts & More
Understanding your North and South Nodes can be the big assist in your journey toward self-awareness and fulfillment. This exercise can help you uncover your deepest desires and move through with a bit more confidence.
I have included the video deep dive I did on all of this and how I was able to move through and start embracing my North Node potential. If you missed the workshop I did on North Nodes and Your Destiny you can get the replay here .
Parisian Beauty Secrets: A Guide to the Best Paris Pharmacies and Skincare Products in France
I keep getting asked this in DM and email - here are some of the Products I bought when I went to the Paris Pharmacies & Beauty Boutiques.
More Paris Pharmacy Products I tried…
Skincare Links
Filorga NEF-Shot - ( I bought 3 bottles of this)
Body care & Hair Care Links
Caudalie Vinosculpt Contouring Concentrate - (love this stuff)
→ Here are some of the Biologique Recherche products I learned about and bought while I was there as well .I really love this brand and being able to treat myself to a two-hour experience and skin assessment at their institute was something I had been wanting to do for myself for a while. You can watch the haul and vlog on that here. ↓
Here are some of the most famous pharmacies in Paris for skincare products, along with their website links and addresses:
Citypharma - 26 Rue du Four, 75006 Paris, France Website: https://www.citypharma.fr/
Pharmacie Monge - 74 Rue Monge, 75005 Paris, France Website: https://www.pharmacie-monge.fr/
Pharmacie Lafayette des Ternes - 77 Avenue des Ternes, 75017 Paris, France Website: https://www.pharmacielafayettedesternes.fr/
Pharmacie de la Place Monge - 74 Rue Monge, 75005 Paris, France Website: https://www.pharmacieplacedmonge.fr/
Pharmacie de l'Opéra - 1 Avenue de l'Opéra, 75001 Paris, France Website: https://www.pharmaciedelopera.com/
Pharmacie Saint Germain - 82 Boulevard Saint-Germain, 75005 Paris, France Website: https://www.pharmacie-saintgermain.fr/
Pharmacie de Paris - 4 Rue du Four, 75006 Paris, France Website: https://www.pharmaciedeparis.fr/
Pharmacie Victor Hugo - 14 Avenue Victor Hugo, 75116 Paris, France Website: https://www.pharmacievictorhugo.com/
Some of the popular products broken down by category that tourists buy when in Paris
Skincare:
Bioderma Sensibio H2O Micellar Water
La Roche-Posay Effaclar Duo+ Acne Treatment Cream
Avene Thermal Spring Water Spray
Embryolisse Lait-Creme Concentre Moisturizer
Nuxe Huile Prodigieuse Multi-Purpose Dry Oil
Caudalie Beauty Elixir Face Mist
Filorga NCTF-Reverse Cream
Vichy Mineral 89 Hyaluronic Acid Serum
Avène Cicalfate Restorative Skin Cream
Nuxe Reve de Miel Lip Balm
Body care:
Nuxe Huile Prodigieuse Multi-Purpose Dry Oil
Klorane Dry Shampoo with Oat Milk
Topicrem Ultra Moisturizing Body Milk
Lierac Body-Slim Anti-Cellulite Concentrate
Caudalie Divine Oil
Vichy Ideal Soleil Anti-Sand SPF 50 Sunscreen
Bioderma Atoderm Shower Gel
La Roche-Posay Lipikar Baume AP+ Body Balm
Roger & Gallet Bois d'Orange Perfumed Soap
Uriage Eau Thermale Thermal Water Spray
Hair care:
Klorane Dry Shampoo with Oat Milk
Phyto Phytopolleine Scalp Treatment
Christophe Robin Cleansing Purifying Scrub with Sea Salt
Rene Furterer Karité Nutri Intense Nourishing Mask
Leonor Greyl Huile de Palme Pre-Shampoo Treatment
Bumble and Bumble Surf Spray
Kérastase Nutritive Nectar Thermique Heat-Protective Leave-In Cream
L'Oreal Professionnel Serie Expert Vitamino Color A-OX Shampoo
Wella Professionals Fusion Intense Repair Mask
Garnier Fructis Hair Food Papaya Repairing Mask
La Roche-Posay Anthelios XL Ultra-Light Fluid SPF 50+
Bioderma Photoderm Max Aquafluide SPF 50+
Avene Very High Protection Emulsion SPF 50+
Vichy Ideal Soleil Anti-Sand SPF 50+
Uriage Bariésun Fragrance-Free Cream SPF 50+
SVR Sun Secure Blur SPF 50+
Nuxe Sun Delicious Cream High Protection SPF 30
Filorga UV-Bronze Anti-Ageing Sun Fluid SPF 50+
Caudalie Vinoperfect Radiance Tinted Moisturizer SPF 20
Klorane Sun Radiance Protective Oil SPF 30
Here are some of the top Paris Skin Estheticians & Institutes :
Vinida Savant: considering skin as a fabric on which our emotions, our thoughts, but also our transgenerational memories, as well as our karmic structures. Her hands contain the energy she has managed to channel, and her gift is to return the inner light of every person so that the face can radiate it as a result of activating the cells. You can book https://www.vinidasavant.com/ and listen to my interview with Vinida here
Isabelle Bellis - A highly-regarded esthetician known for her customized facial treatments and holistic approach to skincare. https://www.isabellebellis.com/
Joelle Ciocco - A pioneer in the field of personalized skincare, Joelle Ciocco has been working as a facialist for over 30 years. She is known for her expertise in skin analysis and creating bespoke skincare regimens. https://www.joelle-ciocco.com/
Christine Clais - Christine Clais is a certified organic esthetician who uses only natural and organic products in her treatments. She specializes in anti-aging treatments . https://www.christineclais.com/
Anne Sémonin - Anne Sémonin is a skincare brand that also offers a range of personalized facial treatments at their flagship spa. Their treatments are designed to target specific skin concerns and use the brand's signature essential oils and marine extracts. https://www.annesemonin.com/fr/
Laure Quinty - Laure Quinty is an esthetician who offers a range of facial and body treatments using high-quality skincare products. She is known for her anti-aging facials and her studio is located in the 8th arrondissement of Paris. http://www.laurequinty.com/
Catherine Pez - Catherine Pez is a holistic esthetician who specializes in facial reflexology and energy work. Her treatments are designed to address both physical and emotional imbalances and are located in the 9th arrondissement of Paris. http://www.catherinepez.com/
Spa Nuxe Montorgueil - This spa is part of the popular Nuxe skincare brand and offers a range of facials, massages, and body treatments and is known for its luxurious and relaxing atmosphere. https://www.nuxe.com/en/spa
Biologique Recherche - Biologique Recherche is a French skincare brand that also offers a range of facial treatments at their flagship spa in the 8th arrondissement of Paris. Their facials are known for their high-quality products and customized approach to skincare - this is where I went to have their signature facial with their Remodeling Face Machine . https://www.biologique-recherche.com/
Caudalie Vinotherapie Spa - Located in the 1st arrondissement of Paris, this spa offers a range of facial and body treatments that incorporate the brand's signature grape-based products. The spa is known for its unique, vineyard-inspired atmosphere and its use of natural ingredients. https://www.caudalie.com/en-us/les-spa
Dermalogica Skin Treatment Center - This skincare brand offers a range of facials and other skincare treatments at their Paris location in the 1st arrondissement. Their treatments are designed to address specific skin concerns and are personalized to each individual client. https://www.dermalogica.fr/fr-fr/dermalogica-skin-treatment-center
L'Institut Darphin - Located in the 8th arrondissement of Paris, this spa offers a range of facial and body treatments using the Darphin skincare line. Their treatments are known for their high-quality products and relaxing atmosphere. https://www.darphin.com/
La Mer Spa - This luxury spa is located in the 8th arrondissement of Paris and offers a range of facials, massages, and body treatments using La Mer's signature products. The spa is known for its elegant decor and indulgent treatments. https://www.lamer.eu/spa-boutiques/paris-spa.html
Oh My Cream Le Studio - The (clean) beauty concept store & skincare studio that gives you access to what is best for your skin. https://en.ohmycream.com/
The SHIFT : Aries Season + New Moon : Journey to Your Authentic Self
Aries brings forth the energy of the warrior, urging us to take action, embrace change, and embark on new beginnings. Aries is the first sign of the zodiac after all, and we can learn a thing or two from them.
The new moon in Aries may stir up feelings of restlessness, anxiety, and heightened emotions. With the ongoing uncertainty surrounding the state of our world and the feeling of helplessness many in the collective feel. It's understandable if you're feeling overwhelmed and defeated. However, instead of succumbing, we can choose to channel what we can “do” into positive and creative outlets - the collective needs you and YOUR gifts more than ever.
This new moon encourages us to reflect on who we are, who we want to become, and how we can align with our true purpose. It’s time to think about your aspirations, listen to your fears, and accept that maybe the way you have been doing things all along is not working…but WHY?
Do you even want to be doing this anymore?
Or have you gotten so caught up in proving & manifesting - you can’t acknowledge you’re unfufilled?
How has chasing the “dream” left you mentally and physically?
Aries rules the head, making us prone to headaches, sinus pressure, overthinking, and eye strain. To counteract these effects, prioritize self-care practices such as meditation, stress reduction, and limiting screen time. Acknoweldge if you are spending as much time fueling yourself and well-being as you are in chasing monetary goals and pursuits?
As we navigate the energy of Aries season, we're reminded to stay focused on our goals while letting go of past limitations. For many of us this is our fear around money, security, destiny, or abandonment. Aries energy can prompt a need for immediate gratification, causing us to settle for the money now, while sacrificing ourselves and true dreams in the long run.
This energy is the ideal time to examine the “nodes of destiny” in your birth chart - where is fear limiting you?
How are you sabotaging yourself from behind the scenes?
This is going to be a huge theme and focus for us in this month’s SHIFT session . The new moon in Aries symbolizes a time of rebirth and renewal, marking the beginning of the astrological year. While it brings forth opportunities for growth and transformation, it also challenges us to confront our fears and insecurities. Embrace this time and sit with yourself, find your courage and know that it's through facing our vulnerabilities that we truly evolve.
As we harness the energy of the Aries new moon, let us embrace the spirit of the warrior within us. But also let us stop fighting ourselves in the process, just long enough so we can really acknowledge where that fear lies and why. What is is trying to protect us from?
The new moon in Aries and the season invites us to embrace change, harness our inner strength, and remeber we are all unique beings. By making friends with the energy of the warrior in us, we can navigate the collective transformative time with courage and grace. I encourage you to embrace the power of the Aries, step into your true essence and create the life of your dreams.
I hope you can join us at this month’s SHIFT Session - our online Self Care Gathering - this month we are diving into our birth charts (don’t worry I’m here to help) and if you cannot make it you can always catch the replay to continue the work on your own.
I’ve also included some of the journaling questions we will be asking ourselves in this month’s session to get you started.
**Journal Entry 1: Exploring Self-Identity**
Who am I? What do I truly desire? Where do you need to be more courageous to live the life you desire? How do you find this courage within you?
**Journal Entry 2: Embracing Change and Letting Go**
What must I be willing to let go of from my past? What fears have become patterns that no longer serve me?
In what ways have I actively embraced change and stepped out of my comfort zone, aligning with the transformative energy of this lunar phase?
- In what ways have I demonstrated resilience in the face of obstacles, to navigate adversity with strength and determination?
Get Ready to Shift: Your Ultimate Guide to Rest, Reset, and Renewal
It's easy to get caught up in the hustle and overwhelm of daily life. No one feels like they have been duped more by “wanting to be an adult” than me 😅. Running from one thing to the next, trying to keep up, secretly just wanting everything on the to-do list to be done so I can sit on my couch, in my clean home, in silence, with a soft breeze caressing me, my glowing skin and freshly manicured toes, while reading that book I’ve brought on three vacations. Yup that book has been to 3 countries😩
Well, I am here to tell you that’s never gonna happen unless you hit pause on this movie that is your life, and make some room for you in the chaos of this dumpsterfire we are in. Now I’m not talking as “Nurse Donna” right now (though I can go on about how all this impacts your health)… I’m speaking as “Donna The Real Life Person” who has had more than her fair share of burnout and is COMMITTED in 2024 to keeping it out of her life like a bad ex.
The "Shift" is more than just a series of sessions—it's a commitment to yourself, a reminder that you are worthy of care and attention.
I know personally that I only keep committed to something when there are other people involved. I know that I have to consciously set out time for self-care and reflection. I also know things don’t happen overnight and small acts create larger shifts in our lives through compounding effects. I have spent a lot of time “working on myself” only to find out that the work just doesn’t end. I’m a constant work in progress and sort of like my city of NY always under construction.
I will be honest this sort of got me super down at one point - I’m like where’s the trophy? How come there aren’t more commas in my checking account? Why don’t I have a Rolex? But there is no end game in this…well until you die…so I gotta “play” the game of life. Instead of waiting for the final win, I have to enjoy the moments and the process in all of it. Just like someone who has a garden..they enjoy their beautiful flowers, plants, and even the actual fruits of their labor…but they enjoy the process more. The shifting of seasons, planting seeds, tending to their work, the harvest, and even the repetition of it all. A lot of them will even say gardening “Relaxes Them”…How does all that work relax you? Because it lightens mood, and lowers cortisol, and stress levels. It’s very gratifying to plant, tend to, harvest, and share your own food. Once relaxed, you're present and intentional in the entire process. Honestly, that’s what I need to do with my life.
The truth is that myself and my friends are in a shift…. physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. While I have no “instruction manual” for this shift, I spent the better part of last year creating routines for it. I saw firsthand how doing this previously in my life with my Moon Circles added to my overall well-being. By having a little moment of sanctuary for rest, reset, and renewal in my own living room kept me more grounded and focused. I need something I could do every month to prioritize my well—being and support myself on my journey of self—discovery. I also needed like-minded people - And I’m encouraging you to do the same, regardless of whether you want to join us or not.
**What to Expect**
"The Shift" is a monthly gathering for you to be with you. A little oasis where you can kick back, relax, and dive deep into some serious self-care. A safe and nurturing space where you can pause, breathe, and reconnect with yourself. Each session will feature a carefully curated blend of activities, including guided meditation, intention-setting exercises, and transformative discussions. Drawing inspiration from the rhythms of nature and honoring celestial monthly themes we'll explore rituals of self-care, personal growth, and intentional living. Whether you're seeking clarity, inspiration, or simply a moment of pause this is the space…you might even have a breakthrough or two along the way.
**Don’t Stress**
You can join us live or catch up on your own time. These monthly sessions will be a unique blend of collective experience with individual focus. While we gather as a community to support each other, the focus remains on your personal journey. It's all about you, babe—your journey, your growth, you being the main character of your movie.
**Why "The Shift" Matters**
Whether you're craving clarity, peace, or just a little TLC - "The Shift" sessions offer a gentle reminder of the importance of slowing down and tuning into ourselves. It’s a moment where you can just BE. By taking intentional time for rest, reset, and renewal, we can cultivate greater resilience, clarity, and joy in our lives. Each session is an opportunity to honor your inner wisdom and release what no longer serves you. It's your permission slip to slow down, tune in, and be a friend to yourself for once.
**Ready to Shift?**
Registration is now open for upcoming sessions. Simply visit this link to snag your spot today. Sessions will be held monthly with limited spaces , but recordings will be available in case you miss it. I cannot wait to join you in this space.
**Or Take The First Step on Your Terms**
As we navigate these times together, it's essential to prioritize our inner well-being. "The Shift" offers a unique opportunity to slow down, tune in, and befriend ourselves. However, if you're not ready to join us just yet, I encourage you to start incorporating regular routines and rituals into your life that prioritize your overall well-being. In case you need some ideas on how to start creating wellness rituals for yourself, you can check out “Monthly Self-Care Crash Course: A Step-by-Step Guide to Prioritizing You”.
As always thank you for being a part of this community ❤❤ Donna
Self-Care Crash Course: A Guide to Prioritizing You
Sometimes things need to go beyond skincare routines and bubble baths to embrace the essence of who you are and who you aspire to be. I have learned that the journey of self-love, self-discovery, and self-empowerment is sacred and personal. It should honor your truth, celebrate your worth, and nourish your soul from within. Sure no one is going to turn down glowing skin, a warm bath, and a glass of natural wine but if you’re here you know this is all much deeper than that.
We all love thriving and living in abundance - but the moments of life are like a wave - you catch a good one for a minute or maybe a little longer and other times you’re crashing, trying to come up for air, and feeling like you’re in a rip tide. It ebbs and it flows. Somedays are great and other days I don’t want to get out of bed. One thing is for sure though - if I stick to some type of loose routine, even when it gets rough…I can navigate a bit better.
This share is for those who have fallen off from their regular routines, have gotten too caught up in the responsibilities of adulting, and need some quick simple steps they can take to feel present and start to get back on track. These are some of the points we address in The Shift sessions but in case you cannot make it or want to do things on your own, or are too overwhelmed, I thought I’d lay out a foundation of steps you can build on. The entire aspect of self-care that I think is lost upon us is the word SELF…you gotta figure out what works for YOU.
Setting An Intention
When things seem out of control, it's essential to start with intention. Setting clear intentions allows us to align our actions with our values and aspirations, guiding us toward a life filled with purpose and meaning. The intention can be around self-care, taking a break, having some fun, getting rest, or just dumping out all the thoughts swirling in your brain. Regardless, it’s the first step in action and tells your brain, we are moving out of this current mindset so pay attention.
Creating Ritual
It’s best to start with one or two that you can do for the next thirty days. I’m not telling you to overhaul your entire life that honestly is the worst idea when you’re overwhelmed or have fallen off. I’m saying start small. Honestly, go and do something fun. Stop doing. Create a ritual around a daily break - even if it’s 10 minutes. Start with little rituals that make you feel good - maybe sitting and being present when you drink your morning coffee and not scrolling on your phone, or a break from social media, even reading 15 minutes a day. Rituals are the cornerstone of wellness, providing us with moments of pause, reflection, and rejuvenation in our busy lives. From morning routines to bedtime rituals, you need to set a foundation for creating personalized self-care rituals that align with your needs and preferences.
Ask yourself are you craving stillness or seeking adventure? What do you do for yourself that makes you feel amazing? Is it a10-minute morning dance party with yourself or the children before school (if you have them) or bedtime affirmations, or laying out your clothes for the next day?
Further Reading & Watching → How To Date Yourself
Nurturing Mind, Body, and Soul
We need to nurture our entire being, mind, body, and soul. What practices support your overall well-being? Is it mindfulness meditation, intentional movement, or nourishing food? By prioritizing well-rounded care, we can cultivate resilience, vitality, and joy in our lives. It also helps us move out of “crisis self-care” and into preventative self-care…so when a crisis does hit we know how to move through it and have systems of support. True wellness and health starts from within.
Watch ↘ Questions for Becoming The Best Version of You
Cultivating Gratitude
I am the first person to tell you that when the shit hits the fan the hardest thing to do is be grateful. When you’re feeling down, brokenhearted, or stressed this is probably the last thing you want to do. However, studies have shown that it is essential to find gratitude in moments of crisis and not after so we do not “hardwire the brain for bad”. Gratitude doesn’t ask you to ignore the serious issues and tragedies - instead, it tells you that too much attention to what’s bad, is bad for you. Taking a moment to pause for gratitude in other areas of your life can bring your awareness to difficulties you have overcome previously and it can help identify your support systems in the moment.
Wellness & Self Care Are Not A Destination
Remember that self-care is not a destination or outcome, but a process and journey. If you take this approach it becomes a series of events in self-discovery, self-love, and self-compassion. Prioritizing your well-being is essential now in our collective shift - you will only be able to show up for community and family if you show up for yourself. No one can pour from an empty cup. I am continuing to explore additional resources, routines, modalities, and support - I encourage you to do the same. I will continue to share what I learn and collect on this site, my YouTube, and my social channels. Whether you choose to join us for "The Shift" sessions or embark on your journey independently, know that you are worthy of care and deserving of love. If you have any additional ideas for moving through please reach out.
→ Futher Reading : Donna’s Journal - Living with Intention in 2024 & Embracing Purpose
Living with Intention: Reflecting on the Year & Embracing Purpose in the future
*** excuse any errors and whatever else you feel so inclined to judge me on***
I think a lot about my old neighbor Paul he was a writer (who survived cancer) and had all these manuscripts and had been working on a movie. I always asked him what he was gonna do with it, because he talked about it so much. He would say “It’s finished…I don’t know”. Right before COVID made its debut his cancer came back pretty aggressively ( I don’t think he had been following up on his scans and appointments).
He passed away during the pandemic and shortly after his family came and cleaned out upstairs. I saw all the boxes of manuscripts being carried out and later I found out they were all just tossed away. No one ever got to see “the script” but Paul.
It’s 2024 and I still feel like it’s March 2020 sometimes in my brain and body. When Paul got admitted to my hospital… and I had to go get him “some belongings” from upstairs. I still think about how his shirts were exactly where he said they would be, “3rd from the left..the blue one”. The nuts he kept in the produce bag, next to the old applesauce jar that was rinsed, label carefully removed, and now was home to something else. I thought “I don’t think I’d ever be able to tell anyone with such clear instructions about my belongings” and at the same time, I took one big look around the room, to take a mental picture. I do this sometimes. I think it’s a photography thing. Or an anxious thing
As a nurse, I knew Paul wasn’t coming home. But I wasn’t gonna tell Paul.
So I grabbed the shirt, the underwear, the jar, and the bag of nuts, and tucked them away in my work bag. I took one more mental picture too.
I think about the astrology reading I had on my couch in January 2020, I think about how deep in my mental anxiety I was before my trip to Palm Springs for Alt Summit in March of that year. How lost I felt, how unaccomplished at life’s checkpoints I am, how confused I was about things, about me, and how I stood in the bathroom looking in the mirror asking for a sign.
On the flight home, I looked at the photo taken of me the day I got there..I was so “out of my body” as the healers like to say. I didn’t even recognize myself in that image. On the last day, I had another photo taken, and in that one..I look like me.. that wrinkle I get in my nose when I’m having fun, the “11 lines” I try to erase with expensive serums.. they were back. Some signs of a spirit with some essence again.
I flew home on the eve of The Dona’s International Women’s Day Event. It was a huge success. I was still in my head though. Fast forward a week later, the city closing down, being a nurse, being very unsure, and being very scared.
I spent the next 3 years very disconnected & connected all at the same time.
Alt Summit - March 2020 - Ace Hotel : Palm Springs
I’ve learned that I can have a plan but “oh wow, is the Universe gonna ‘Out, Donna me’ and just do what she wants”. I gotta be honest this had me feeling a bit defeated a lot over the past few years..but also it’s made me very grateful. That’s an odd dichotomy. It’s a mind fuck sometimes. I’m not gonna lie.
I spent the good part of 2023 dealing with health stuff, being on the other side of the patient experience, and remembering why preventative care is just as important as mental health. How there’s no point in having a soul that feels so alive, without a body that can keep up with it. Mostly an attempt to find a balance between being present, living in the moment, giving energy to what I can control, and being very intentional about the rest. But open to “something greater”. Caring for myself, while also holding onto community.
My word for 2023 was “EASE” and while I haven’t mastered it…I created some of it. I also went with the flow. I took my “plans” and relabeled them as “intentions” and tried my best to stay present.
Last night my husband and I started the Vision Board Brainstorm together [I originally recorded this and made the workshop format in this way so he and I could do it together]. We started on the “Year In Review” Module and while my most “unreal moment” of the past year was getting to see Beyonce first row with one of my best friends {you can watch that here}, it was taken to the next level when we ended up in the Renaissance Film. I gotta admit seeing my face on a screen that big, the first thing I thought was “Wow, either she has a filter on us, or all those skincare products really do work 😂.” And while that’s a great Instagram post, and makes a great dinner convo. The best moments were the everyday ones and the people I was having those conversations with.
This year I put myself out there in a different way. I took some chances and I let myself be a little more cringe
I don’t want to have regrets and I don’t want my work and what I create to end up on the curb, on “large garbage day” like Paul’s. Mostly because, of all my own BS. I think I’m closer to figuring out how to get some of the things I want to create out of my tornado mind. As well as the intention behind it. But mostly I want to help you not have regrets either.
My word/words for 2024 is “I’m Not Regular”
I’m tired of trying to fit myself into a box, slap a label on myself or “pre-chew” what I do so “they” can digest me better. That’s the label - NOT REGULAR.
My mantra for 2024 is “I don’t have a little life, it’s pretty BIG”.
Because I want to approach every little moment like it’s the biggest thing happening to me. I guess this is what I mean by intention. Not some new age spiritual thing, just simply “with purpose”. It allows me to be in it and savor it..without stopping to remind myself to take that “mental photo”.
There’s a lot we cannot control and a lot of generational BS that we didn’t create but have to figure out how to navigate. And there’s so much we can learn to enjoy in the every day (I’m proof of that)..there’s a lot of simple joy we can design for ourselves..and one another. And I owe myself a lot more than the default mode I was taught I should be operating out of. And so do you.
I found out on New Year’s Eve that I’m going to be a speaker at Alt Summit. Crazy huh? That’s the Universe “Out Donna-ing Me” Again. Anyway Welcome to 2024. Let’s get on with this list…shall we?!?
PS: I watched this video everyday of 2023 since it was sent to me..I hope it does for you what it did for me
PPS: I made a lil recap if my entire year in Instagram. Im giving each month its own post. you can follow along if you like + my year in review
Can Vision Boards Work? How Do You Make A Vision Board?
If you have been following along you know by now I love vision boards - I also get a huge eye roll from my friends and people around me when I start talking about visualizations and meditating. So I set out to do some research on why vision boards work and how you can make sure they become more than just wall decor.
So if you’re tired of creating vision boards that end up gathering dust in the corner or are very skeptical about making one in the first place - this series is for you. I read a lot of journal articles and did some research on how Vision Boards Connect In with the Reticular Activating System of your brain , how sometimes we need to figure out what we do not want in life..in order to bring in what we do want and how all of this interacts with our subconscious. [Don’t worry Im listing all of the videos in this post - keep scrolling.]
From The Vision Board Brainstorm - learn more here
From my research, the main takeaways were that you need to embark on a mission with these vision boards. It’s not just a one-and-done thing you do on a weekend - it’s something that needs to be continuous. I even started keeping track of my own boards publicly on this site for accountability.
After doing my research I realized this is where a lot of people are dropping the ball (not on purpose…it’s just happening). So I made this series of videos sharing what I learned and then decided to take it a step further for those who were serious about it and created The Vision Board Brainstorm.
So if you ever felt like your vision board was missing that secret sauce? Well, guess what? It probably was. Your boards should be more than just about pretty pictures; it's about diving deep into the science of your mind and crafting a tool that resonates with your wildest dreams. Don’t worry all the videos I made will help you sort this out.
From the Vision Board Brainstorm
Most people have an idea about their “wildest dreams” but don’t know how to take the first step. In discovering your dreams, you need to shake off what's holding you back, and ultimately allow yourself to have a transformative experience. My series of videos and The Vision Board Brainstorm guide you through exercises that not only lay out your vision board but also bulldoze the blocks standing between you and your success.
Think of it as Science meets Vision Boards, and you finally shake hands with your subconscious and become friends. These methods go way beyond the surface and help you get what you want out of life.
Unveiling Your Cosmic Potential : Scorpio New Moon Rituals For Transformation & Manifesting
The mysterious Scorpio New Moon asks us to explore the depths of what’s hidden - including the shadow components of “self”.
Scorpio, ruled by Pluto, is associated with intensity, depth, and regeneration. During this lunar phase, the cosmos encourage us to delve into our innermost layers, confronting both our light and shadow aspects.
This is a great time for shadow work and dealing with deep emotion. It’s time to channel & work with the intense Scorpio energy to further your self discovery and transformation.
You may feel Scorpio season is an inner death and rebirth specifically around some of your unresolved issues. Its time to embrace vulnerability - release and renew and step into your personal metamorphosis. This lunar phase encourages introspection, self-reflection and understanding of your emotions. It's a time to set intentions for personal transformation, harnessing the Scorpio energy to let go of what no longer serves us and emerge stronger, wiser, and more authentically aligned with our true selves.
November Self Care Themes
This month, is about confronting the shadows within, acknowledging our growth and honoring our resilience. The wellness themes under during the Scorpio New Moon :
Wellness Themes:
Embracing Personal Transformation - Identify areas in your life where transformative change is needed and commit to the process.
Shadow Work and Self - Discovery Confront and embrace your shadow aspects, acknowledging them as integral parts of your whole self.
Releasing and Letting Go - Practice forgiveness, both towards others and yourself, fostering a sense of liberation.
Sexual and Emotional Healing - Scorpio is linked to the sensual and emotional aspects of life. It’s time to foster a positive relationship with your own sensuality.
Manifesting Themes:
Be clear and define what you want to manifest. Themes around personal growth, relationships, or any area of your life that calls for positive change.
Scorpio is a water sign associated with deep emotions. Infuse your intentions with strong, positive emotions. Feel the emotions associated with achieving your desires as if they have already manifested - feel those feels in your body as if they have come thru.
Challenge your growth, while being reealistic.
Scorpio is a water sign, symbolizing emotions and intuition. Take a ritualistic bath or spend time near water during the New Moon. Visualize yourself being washed clean and renewed.
AFFIRMATION:
"I EMBRACE MY HIDDEN STRENGTHS. LIKE A PHOENIX, I RISE FROM THE ASHES OF TRANSFORMATION.. I AM A FORCE OF REGENERATION, AND WITH EACH CHALLENGE, I EMERGE STRONGER, WISER, AND MORE ALIGNED WITH MY TRUE SELF."
Journaling:
o IN WHAT WAYS CAN YOU BE A BETTER ARCHITECT OF YOUR DESTINY?
o WHAT CHALLENGES FROM THE PAST WERE YOU ABLE TO RISE OUT OF THE ASHES FROM AND STEP INTO A NEW VERSION OF YOU?
o WHAT ASPECTS OF YOUR LIFE COULD BENEFIT FROM A “DEATH & REBIRTH”?
o WHAT EMOTIONS OR TRAITS HAVE YOU BEEN RELUCTANT TO CONFRONT?
o WRITE A LETTER TO YOURSELF - LET GO OF ANY SHAME OR SOMETHING YOU HAVE BEEN TOO HARD ON YOURSELF FOR.
Life Lately: Links, Shares & a Mouthwatering Dutch Baby Recipe for a "Basic" Brunch at Home
I’m another year older and maybe wiser 👀
the jury is still out on that one depending on who you ask. I am however reflective and grateful. Around this time of year (6 months countdown until my bday), I usually get depressed or sad..not for the year going by so fast but for aging I guess. Mostly because I was taught to feel bad about getting older. Somewhere along the way, I guess I started listening - because when I was younger I thought it was so rad - I couldn't wait to have to use both hands to show someone my age [holding up 10 fingers felt like a win] and then when I could say I was a teenager I felt like a GOD, 18, and then 21..I mean drinking legally and gambling..with age came the societal acceptance of vices and debauchery…why wouldn’t you want to do this?!?!? Ahh, but also more responsibility - bills, life, death, credit card debt, breakups...yeah you get it.
Anyway, this year I wasn’t regretful or in the feels. I was really grateful. Maybe doing the work on yourself…actually works. Who knows?!?!
Here are some of the things I’ve been reflective and introspective about. Some of the things I’ve been up to. Where I’ve been eating, spending my time, & overspending my money. Oh, and some of the things I’ve been reading and watching and almost breaking a tooth on because I’m trying to hold my phone above my face in bed at 2 am. Shall we proceed?
Last year we went to Paris for our birthdays with NO Itinerary and for the first time I fully embraced being present and going with the flow on a vacation. I ended up saving a dude’s life on the plane there [you can listen to that here] and I did take a lot of photos and video so I made this VLOG [here] and this skincare care haul video from the Paris shops I went to [here]. it’s odd because I don’t know if I was so burnt out from the pandemic, overwhelmed by the in-flight rapid response, or not having an itinerary [I do love control]…but my memory recall of that trip is difficult without the photos and videos. So that vlog is a long one but it’s more for me than an audience. I did however have a huge inspirational encounter on that trip with a brand called Universale Buly and since then have gone down many rabbit holes at 3 am about it and the owners. I also met a wonderful esthetician Vinida Savant who I interviewed here , and I got to hang out with some women who showed me je no se quai in real-time [I wrote some things about that here] and since then I have really been trying to adopt my own. And honestly, I think that was the purpose of the trip for me..not to make another best-of-food list for Paris - though I did eat great food. Instead, it was to share my personal takeaways and inspirations and now that I’m writing this maybe I do remember more than I thought haha. Or maybe I just needed some time to “unpack & appreciate” that trip. Just maybe that’s what I was supposed to remember. Also, a little odd fact the night before I left had a dream about an old friend I haven’t seen in years. In the dream, they told me to watch the movie Frida - about an artist I am very fond of and inspired by Frida Kahlo. I woke up that morning and while I was packing watched it, Ironically when I got on the plane it was the movie suggested to me on the lil TV to watch on the flight, and then when I got to Paris the neighborhood I was staying in had a beautiful mural on one of the side streets I had stumbled down one morning on my way to get us croissants, macarons, and cheese for breakfast with yup you guessed it - Frida. You can learn more about Frida Kahlo and her works here and here .
++ Since I keep getting asked this in DMs - here are Some Of the Products I bought when I went to the Paris Pharmacies & Beauty Boutiques.
→ Here are some of the Biologique Recherche products I learned about and bought while I was there as well [I made a list on Amazon as you can get some of them here] . .I really love this brand and being able to treat myself to a two-hour experience and skin assessment at their institute was something I had been wanting to do for myself for a while. You can watch the haul and vlog on that here.
More Paris Pharmacy Products
Skincare
Bioderma Sensibio H2O Micellar Water
Avene Thermal Spring Water Spray
Caudalie Beauty Elixir Face Mist
Vichy Mineral 89 Hyaluronic Acid Serum
Avène Cicalfate Restorative Skin Cream
Nuxe Reve de Miel Lip Balm
Embryolisse Lait Creme
Caudalie Vinoperfect Radiance serum
Ialuset hyaluronic acid cream
Body care & Hair Care
Nuxe Huile Prodigieuse Multi-Purpose Dry Oil
Lierac Body-Slim Anti-Cellulite Concentrate
Caudalie Vinosculpt Contouring Concentrate
Vichy Ideal Soleil Anti-Sand SPF 50 Sunscreen
Bioderma Atoderm Shower Gel
La Roche-Posay Lipikar Baume AP+ Body Balm
Roger & Gallet Bois d'Orange Perfumed Soap
Uriage Eau Thermale Thermal Water Spray
Dutch Baby Recipe… as promised.
And finally - I am a grown-up girl on a budget (getting older also makes you think about retirement accounts apparently and healthcare and other things that are no fun). So I have been trying to eat out and order in less often. Brunch is a real money suck in my opinion - you’re paying crazy amounts of money for eggs and pancakes and you’re hungry again 3 three hours and take it from someone that’s worked in the restaurant industry it tastes better than home because of all the butter. In trying to be better to my wallet and arteries I have mastered making “Dutch Babies” which are basically fancy pancakes for lazy people Pancakes.
New Moon In Libra: Balance
The Libra New Moon, known for its emphasis on balance and harmony, presents an opportunity to infuse these principles into your self-care and wellness routines. It's a chance to nurture both your physical and emotional well-being.
The Libra New Moon beckons us to strike a harmonious chord between our vulnerability and inner strength.
This New Moon encourages us to find a harmonious balance between our vulnerability and inner strength. It's an ideal time to incorporate practices promoting inner peace, such as yoga and meditation, helping you center your thoughts and emotions. Simultaneously, consider striking a balance between nutrition and exercise for the well-rounded nourishment of your body, offering energy and cellular healing. Remember that wellness encompasses not only your physical health but also your daily routines, state of mind, entertainment choices, information consumption, conversations, and social connections.
This Libra New Moon encourages us to find equilibrium between our personal desires and our relationships with others.
Want to take your monthly manifesting deeper?
The Libra New Moon invites us to seek equilibrium between our personal desires and our interactions with others. During this lunar phase, introspection plays a pivotal role. It prompts a thorough evaluation of your relationships and the overall harmony in your life. This moment calls for recalibration, making amends, and realigning your energies to foster a more balanced existence.
Relationships: Set intentions for improving communication, strengthening existing relationships, or attracting new, harmonious connections.
Balance: Focus on setting intentions to restore balance in areas of your life where you feel out of sync, whether it's work-life balance, emotional equilibrium, or physical well-being.
Manifestation Themes:
Visualize Balance: Use this time to visualize and meditate on the harmony you wish to create in your life.
Balanced Lifestyle Wellness Rituals: Incorporate self-care practices that promote both physical and emotional balance. Consider yoga, meditation, journaling, and mindful breathing exercises. Rituals that balance the body and the mind. Indulge in activities that uplift you such as enjoying art and music.
Themes: Harmony, Love, Justice, and finding the balance that has been lost. Nurturing both your physical & emotional while finding the relationship push/pull between each.
AFFIRMATION:
i am balanced in all areas of my life
Journal:
What aspects of my life feel out of balance right now? How can I work towards restoring equilibrium?
How do I currently nurture my own well-being, both physically and emotionally?
What is my idea of inner and outer beauty, and how do I integrate these ideals into my daily life?
How can I incorporate more mindfulness and self-care practices into my daily routine to enhance my sense of balance and harmony?
Reflect on the concept of compromise. Are there areas of your life where you need to find middle ground or negotiate better?
Consider the idea of giving and receiving. Are there areas where you feel you give too much or receive too little? How can you adjust this balance?
New Moon In Virgo : Ground, Lay Foundations or Restructure
This moon is about being practical, grounded, and building and advancing areas of your life that you have laid the groundwork for. Foundations, restructuring, and Iterations are the energies we will be surrounded by and should be taking advantage of.
This earth sign brings with it grounded energy that gives us the confidence and vision to try something new or restructure something we have already begun on…we might be putting an end to old ways, family “traditions” that do not mesh with us, healing our ancestral cycles or breaking them. For many of us, the generational patterns that no longer serve are ending with us, and while this shift can be powerful, it can feel exhausting, uneasy, and chaotic.
There is a lot of self-awareness under this new moon so turn those eyes and ears on yourself as well, have you been listening to that inner voice? Seeing the whole picture, or paying attention to the details? This moon energy is ripe for tailoring and refining our jobs, careers, health, wellness, and self-care routines. What did you do for you this week?
Want to take your monthly manifesting deeper?
It’s time to organize and put personal systems in place that will bring less stress down the road. This is major WORK IT energy but don’t get too in your head or overly analytical that it gets you stuck.
Work routines, daily routine and health can also be tackled at this time, showing us once again what needs to be balanced, what we have neglected or haven’t learned, and reminding us balance is everything.
Virgo energy is about details, processing, work, and discipline.
It's time to come up with an action plan and create strategies for your best life. This is "no time for bullshit" type of energy, everything can be yours if you stay focused and disciplined.
What is important to you and what you hold sacred should be your top priority right now
What do you want as an individual? What do you need? Not the things society and advertising and everyone with an opinion tells you that you need. What do you actually need? What makes you happy? How can you be a better human to society by filling your cup? Boundaries? Better Routines? Letting go of bad habits that hold you back.... but are, oh so familiar? This month it’s time to ask yourself how is your relationship to yourself ? Do you hold that relationship as sacred as you do to others?
TASK:
Buy flowers for your home or office. Treat yourself to a good home cooked meal (or order in some food that reminds you of your fav childhood meal) - Virgo rules the digestive system.
Write down 3 goals (both long-term and short-term)
Mantra:
"I promise to be kind and gentle with myself and let go of anything that does not allow love to live in me.”
Journal:
What can I give myself space to heal from so I don’t feel stuck and can move forward with all the things I want for my life? What have I overcome? What do I need to over come? What are my intentions for the next six months?
Enhancing Self-Care with Astrology: Insights for Personal Growth & Transformation
An astrologer telling a lady's fortune. Lithography by J Prat after CC Renoux. Created between 1835 and 1841?. Credit Wellcome Collection
Astrology is like a secret sauce for getting a grip on yourself. Astrology can be great for self-care and personal growth because it helps you understand yourself on a deeper level - I like to think of it as an unconditionally loving parent - it’s proud of you and tells you how great you are, but will also tell you where you’re not so great, or the things holding you back, or traits that can work against you. It can help you realize where you're stuck and uncover the “whys”, or “how come”, or maybe why the same challenges and blocks keep coming up for you.
It can help you see the reasons behind your recurring ABILITY TO NOT SEE THE RED FLAGS and keep making the same mistakes
I don’t like to use it so much as predictive or absolute. I use it as a tool - sort of like when I look at the weather to know if I should bring an umbrella, or wear a coat - I might not need the coat, it might not even rain but at least I’m thinking ahead. Think of it as a cosmic GPS. Now, let me be clear, astrology won't solve all your problems or be your therapist (there’s my disclaimer), it’s another tool to have in the toolbox of ways to tackle life and your growth. As much as I ask people for their signs and use them as an icebreaker at parties - I mostly enjoy it as a way to connect with people and myself. I never sum someone up based on their sign - there are so many layers to people.
A fortune-teller is reading a young woman's hand: Engraving, 1700/1750. Created 1700–1750.
Will all that being said I created a video and podcast [linked below] on how I utilize astrology for my own self-care and deep dives when it comes to expression, emotions, my blocks, and ways to be more authentically myself. It has helped me take better care and cultivate different approaches to being present for myself. It can be challenging to determine what exactly you require on a given day. Astrology and horoscopes can assist you in narrowing down and gaining a better understanding of your self-care needs for a particular day. They provide guidance and insights that can help in identifying what one might be seeking in terms of self-care.
The Intentions, Gratitude & Astro Manifesting Workbook
only on the DONASshop.com → Instant Download
Video Session : Astrology - The Secret Sauce To A Better Life ↓
Here are some ways to self-care for the different sun, moon, & rising signs.
Image from page 244 of "The mystic test book; or, The magic of the cards. Giving the mystic meaning of these wonderful and ancient emblems in their relationship to the heavenly bodies, under all conditions; with rules and processes for reading or delineat - The Library of Congress
Aries: As a fire sign, Aries tend to have a lot of energy and can benefit from physical activities like exercise or dance. Take the time to indulge in your passions and hobbies to keep your spirit uplifted.
Taurus: Taurus loves indulging in the finer things in life, so treat yourself to a luxurious bubble bath, aromatherapy, or a cozy night in with your favorite comfort foods.
Gemini: Gemini loves to communicate and learn, so try journaling, meditating, or taking up a new skill or hobby to stimulate your mind and keep your thoughts positive.
Cancer: As a water sign, Cancer needs to prioritize emotional self-care. Make sure you surround yourself with people who uplift you and take time to nurture yourself with activities like art or nature walks.
Leo: Leos love to be the center of attention, so indulge in activities that allow you to shine, like dance or theater. Make sure to pamper yourself with a spa day or a shopping trip.
Virgo: Virgos are natural organizers, so take the time to tidy up your space and create a comfortable and calming environment. Practice self-care by treating yourself to a healthy meal or indulging in your favorite tea.
Libra: As a sign of balance, Libras benefit from activities that promote harmony, like yoga or meditation. Make time for social activities and surround yourself with people who uplift you.
Scorpio: Scorpios are intense and emotional, so practice self-care by indulging in activities like hot baths, massages, or listening to music that speaks to your soul.
Sagittarius: Sagittarius loves adventure and learning, so take time to explore new things and plan a trip. Practice self-care by taking breaks from your work and spending time in nature.
Capricorn: Capricorns are natural leaders, so make sure to prioritize self-care by delegating tasks and taking breaks from your responsibilities. Indulge in activities that allow you to relax, like reading or taking a warm bath.
Aquarius: As a free spirit, Aquarius benefits from activities that promote independence, like solo travel or creative pursuits. Practice self-care by indulging in hobbies that bring you joy.
Pisces: Pisces are sensitive and intuitive, so make time for self-care activities that allow you to tap into your creativity, like painting or writing. Indulge in activities that bring you peace, like a warm bath or a cozy night in.
Inner Child Healing: What is it & How Can it Help You?
If you're wondering what inner child healing is, you're not alone. It's a way for adults to take care of themselves by addressing parts of themselves that need love or healing based on what happened to them when they were younger. Positive and negative experiences from childhood can shape how we communicate, show up in relationships, and even how we treat ourselves later on in life.
It's not a little person inside of you, but rather your subconscious mind that has been formed by experiences and traumas from ages 0-9.
So, who exactly is this inner child? These experiences, or lack thereof, can affect how you show up in your adult life. Science has shown that the right side of our brain, responsible for emotions and creativity, is formed in the first five years of life, making it crucial to our overall well-being. While, the inner adult is governed by the left side of our brain, which is responsible for logic, reasoning, and analysis. It collects and analyzes the lessons and experiences we've had throughout our lives. So if that child was not tended to, it’s needs were not met, was told it couldn’t express itself, to stop crying, toughen up, and also have to navigate traumas alone - it can all show up in your adult life.
How do you know if you need inner child healing? Childhood wounds can lead to imposter syndrome, depression, anxiety, unhealthy coping mechanisms, unhealthy relationships, and more.
Here are some ideas and ways you can “parent” that inner child now in your adult life:
Writing letters or cards to yourself, sending yourself flowers, and looking at photos of yourself can all help to cultivate self-love and self-compassion.
Going to therapy can also be incredibly helpful in identifying and working through emotional triggers and patterns.
Inner child meditation and breathwork can be great practices for connecting with your emotions and building self-awareness.
Guided journaling and asking yourself how you really feel each morning can also help you to tune into your emotions and understand what may be causing them.
Mirror work can be a powerful practice for building self-love and acceptance, and going out and playing can be a great way to release stress and reconnect with your inner child.
Giving yourself the gift of doing the things you didn’t get to do as a child. Taking yourself to places, on vacations, or participate in activities you were not able to. Even buying yourself the presents you always wanted and never received.
Showing up for yourself and tending to the ways you did not have security, support of the ways to express yourself as a child.
Keep exploring and experimenting with different practices and modalities to find what works best for you. Remember to be patient and gentle with yourself, and celebrate the progress you make along the way.
And if you want you can listen to this episode where I explain Inner Child Healing and take a deep dive on additiona; ways to explore it ↓
I took a trip to Disney and Universal Studios and did some inner child healing with the trip - I share my time there as well as my experience in this VLOG ↓
The Art of Je Ne Sais Quoi: How to Stand Out with Effortless Charm
↓Je ne sais quoi : The Effortless & Joyful Approach to Life - full session
When I was in Paris I got the chance to hang out with some very inspiring and chic Parisian women. They all embodied that Je No Sais Quoi or effortless, “can’t put your finger on it”, “draw you in”, and “I want to know more about her” vibe. What I learned from my time with them is that Je No Sais Quoi is effortless, simple, and natural - you cannot buy it. The women I spent time with shared some of the secrets “to their essence” - for one they listen to themselves, their bodies, Intuition, their spirits, and that inner voice above everything else. They move through life without letting anyone else define them and keep their values and priorities front and center. From my time there I realized Je Ne Sais Quoi comes out of personal and, regular care to the mind, body, and spirit. It cannot be replicated, it’s individual, and cannot be explained but instead, you just have to experience it and live it.
These women have an aura that just draws you in
It’s about personal style, beauty routines, and nurturing the soul as much as the body. It’s about tending to your skin and having routines that enhance your natural beauty and natural features instead of trying to look like someone else or putting on a mask. It’s your personality being just as unique as your outfit and accessories. It’s about finding your own formula when it comes to skincare and your wardrobe, being timeless, and not always following the trends. It’s about simplicity, balance, taking your time, and enjoying the process. It’s about being confident and comfortable in your own skin, it cannot be bought or learned it needs to be done - It’s a way of life and finding pleasure in the regular, everyday, and even the most routine.
Dating Yourself : Teaches Others How To Treat You
If you’re not treating yourself well & prioritizing you - what message are you sending to others in your life?
If there is one thing we all can agree on - it’s that living in this dumpster fire is not easy. It’s overwhelming and fast-paced, and we can tend to really forget about ourselves. Plus we have the internet, people in our lives, and social media telling us what we should like or should be into at a given moment of the day. It’s a lot.
We tend to put ourselves on the back burner quite frequently and while we are running our lives with what everyone else wants to do or what they like - we don’t make time to do what we like. This leads to things like burnout and emotional exhaustion. It makes us detached and has us feeling a “failing to thrive”. We might not even know what we “like” to do anymore. So when people ask us “What would make you happy right now?” - the response in your head is usually “Well if I knew that I wouldn’t be having this conversation right now…would we Sharon?!?!”
This was the case for me a few years ago ( I go deeper into it on this podcast episode) and what I found was that “Dating Myself” was what I really needed. Plus therapy and some other things. But this is about this.
My friend J.F. sent me the book The Artist’s Way and with it in hand, I set out to figure out new interests, while remembering the old things I like that I let slip away. I also had to get real with myself and let go of the things that really weren’t bringing me any joy anymore but I was holding onto “just because…”
I know what you're thinking - "What? Date myself? Isn't that just being alone?". Yes…sort of.. But hear me out. Dating yourself is all about prioritizing your own needs and figuring out what you want to do. Not going along with the crowd. It's about cultivating a healthy relationship with yourself, just like you would with a partner, a friend, or anyone you have a close relationship with.
So why should you date yourself?
Self-discovery: Dating yourself allows you to explore your interests, values, and desires. You can get out of your comfort zone, try new things, do what excites you, and be fully present in it.
Self-care: When you date yourself, you prioritize your own needs and take care of yourself. You can take yourself on dates, buy yourself gifts, or do things that make you feel good. This helps you learn how to speak your own language and then gives you the confidence to let those in your life know how to treat you.
Independence: When you learn to enjoy your own company, you become more independent. You don't need someone else to fill your cup, or bring you joy - you do it for yourself.
Boundaries: When you stop relying on others for your happiness you aren’t afraid to say “you don’t want to do something” or say “ no”.
So if you’re thinking - Ok this sounds great…but give me some ideas here Donna. Here are some things I’ve made a part of my “Date Myself” Ritual.
Take yourself on a date: just like you would go out of your way to plan a date for a partner or friends visiting from out of town - do it for yourself. I know pretty simple. But…see how hard it is to follow thru on that.
Splurge on Yourself: a new outfit, a new piece of jewelry, that piece of luggage for your travels, a trip, a book, a haircut, a day at the spa - whatever you want.
Set Aside a Block of Time Daily or Weekly For JUST YOU - just like you spend time on social, or texting or FaceTiming friends - take a chunk of that time and be social with yourself.
Get a hobby: Take up a new hobby or activity - Use this time to explore your interests and learn new skills.
Travel solo: One of the best things I ever did was start solo traveling - it can be a weekend, a day trip, or a week alone.
Journal: Start with simple things like a brain dump, or daily gratitude..from there you can dig deeper. Journaling and reviewing my thoughts, emotions, and ideas has helped me so much. I even took the journal/planner I made for myself and put it in the Donas Shop.
Vision Boarding: if you know me, you know I love vision boarding. Just like we ask our friends and children their wildest dreams we should ask ourselves. Vision boarding is a great way to do what.
If you want more of this …listen to the podcast below or get some more ideas and my personal shares in the video
Can Intuition Be Learned? How to Develop Your Intuition: A Guide to Unlocking Your Inner Wisdom
The Simple Answer Is Yes. We are all intuitive by nature - we are animals. We have fight or flight. We can sense threats and danger. Some of us are better at it than others. But Why?
Intuitive People make time for and prioritize - Introspection, Solitude, Authenticity, Empathy, Safe Spaces, Exploration, Creativity, and Mindfulness.
How? Intuitive people understand that intuition is a muscle and like a muscle if you don’t use it, it gets weak. If you exercise it and nurture it - it strengthens.
↓Listen to the full session
Are you looking to tap into your inner wisdom and develop your intuition? If so, you're not alone. Many people want to enhance their intuitive abilities but aren't sure where to start. The good news is that intuition can be learned and developed over time. l have explored this over the past few years and wanted to share some practical steps to help you cultivate your own intuition.
Introspection
This method is probably the first place to start - check in with yourself. Ask yourself “How Am I?”. Perform body scans to see where and what you are feeling in your body and emotions. Reflect on your day and interactions. Talk about and honor your feelings/ emotions. They let the intuition come forward in their bodies so that know how to move through a situation
Additional Practices & Routines that have worked for me:
Embrace solitude: detach from others' opinions and spend time with yourself to recharge and reflect.
Prioritize authenticity: be your authentic self in every space and act from your values.
Cultivate empathy: put yourself in others' shoes, pick up on social cues, and hold space for others.
Seek safe spaces: go where you are celebrated and welcome others in need of acceptance.
Explore new experiences and learning opportunities to develop self-awareness and intuition.
Embrace creativity: trust your intuition to guide you, find unique solutions to problems, and stay open to new ideas.
Practice mindfulness: focus on the present moment, pause before reacting, and ask yourself what's best for everyone.
Pay attention to your dreams
Dreams can be a powerful tool for unlocking your intuition. Keep a dream journal & write down your dreams as soon as you wake up. Look for patterns and recurring symbols in your dreams, as they may hold important messages for you.
↓ Watch the Session
Science Stuff: Intuitive thinking is often associated with creativity, while analytical reasoning is linked to logic and problem-solving. A balance of both is necessary for well-rounded decision-making. Some people may be emotional responders who need time to process information, while others may be sacral responders who rely on their gut feelings.
Trust your gut: Your gut instincts are often your intuition trying to communicate with you. Pay attention to those "gut feelings" and trust them, even if they don't seem to make sense at the time.
Practice active listening: To be intuitive, you need to be a good listener. Practice active listening by really focusing on what the other person is saying, and try to understand their perspective. This will help you pick up on subtle cues and emotions that can inform your intuition.
Spend time in nature: Spending time in nature can be a powerful way to connect with your intuition. Take a walk in the woods, sit by the ocean, or simply spend some time in your backyard. Allow yourself to be present in the moment and see what insights come to you.
Practice mindfulness meditation: Mindfulness meditation is a powerful way to quiet the mind and connect with your intuition.
Use divination tools: Divination tools, such as tarot cards, runes, or pendulums, can be a helpful way to access your intuition. These tools can help you tap into your subconscious mind and uncover hidden insights and truths.
Remember, intuition is a skill that can be developed with practice and patience. By incorporating these ideas into your daily life, you can become more in tune with your intuition and trust yourself to make decisions based on your inner wisdom.
Understand that intuition is a muscle - and like a muscle, it can be strengthened.
More Reading : Article from Scientific American - Can We Rely On Our Intuition?
intuition, develop intuition, inner wisdom, introspection, solitude, authenticity, empathy, safe spaces, exploration, creativity, mindfulness, analytical reasoning, intuitive thinking
Self Care hard ™️
We’ve been told “Work Hard…Play Hard” . but we have never been told to tend & take care of ourselves HARD.
Or maybe we did but I was too busy working & playing hard that I didn’t get the memo ↓
That seems to be a running theme for me sometimes “not getting the memo” whether it’s at work cause I got too overwhelmed by the amount of emails in my inbox and flipped to social media instead. Or me not realizing for close to 2 years when I was in grade school that I was the butt of the inside joke and I was not laughing with people but they were instead laughing at me. OOhhf. Or continue to keep relationships, connections, projects, or even wild nights on life support when they are long overdue on their expiration because I have this thing with nostalgia. Nostalgia and I go way back…like old lovers. So maybe I’m just late to this or exactly on time…who knows? But here we are.
I think sometimes the hardest part is knowing how & where to start.
Here we all are after two years of being in a Global Pandemic and all things it brought, ended, or finally made us aware of. Two years of being in The Dumpster Fire, turning Forty Years Old on a Zoom birthday, Times Square looking like that scene from “Eyes Wide Shut”, people running out of the city and me being given an “official letter” by the Governor that I can stay out past “curfew”. All while having my “ lil project” mirror “lil donna” and just do what it wanted to do regardless of my plans for it.
Two years of starting a podcast, hosting moon circles, running on fumes, starting a small business, feeling good & feeling like I failed all at the same time. Two years of actual “Survival Mode”.
I had a lot of ups and downs and also had very few reserves left. I was leaning into unhealthy habits again, old “stuff” was coming up, and I felt isolated and disconnected from friends, family, and myself. But also none of the “things” that used to bring me joy…were. So I couldn’t “fix” it….even temporarily.
The things that I used to like or look forward to didn’t hit for me anymore. I felt like I fell off. & I was pissed at myself for letting this happen…AGAIN.
And this pissed me off - I had spent the previous few years really working on my mental health, “unpacking”, pushing myself out of my comfort zones, paying down my debt, finding a community, creating community, and this project on the internet. On paper, I should be thriving. But in reality, I wasn’t. How the hell did I find myself back at square one and slipping again?
This time I surrendered.
Mostly because…I was too tired to resist. I couldn’t go another round. So I called myself out on my shit…AGAIN but this time made podcast episodes about it. I did things like Hygge, addressed my social media addiction, practiced staying present, dealt with my shadow resentment, and saved a dude’s life on a plane. I evaluated and reestablished my relationship with booze, myself, “fixing” and codependency.
After almost a year of being in my feelings, eating whatever I wanted (I gained almost 20 pounds), and holding space for myself, ya girl was ready. I decided the first step was to finally clean out the basement and attic of my mental and emotional health and dust the cobwebs of the things that crept back. From there, my physical health would follow. Oh yeah and this time would give me some grace and consideration for all the stress we had been under the last 2 years, I accepted that my nervous system was wildly overwhelmed and needed to recoup.
I accepted that this didn’t happen overnight & I probably wasn’t going to “bounceback” like I used to.
For one Im not 22 anymore. But also we have really been through it. So… I have spent over a year working on this in therapy and workshops and reading science articles and studies. also Reddit boards and memes.
I tried to figure out the best balance for my dopamine-loving, checking-off, and list-making self, and I came up with Self Care Hard.
During the time I was figuring out how to get my shit together again, I sat next to my co-worker and said I out loud “I just wish I had a mom who would like tell me what to do and plan it all out” and she said, “I just wish there was this guide on how to do it..”
How could two nurses be sitting there wanting someone to guide them and hold their hands in taking care of themselves?
How could we not know how?? We ARE NURSES, it is in fact what we do. But hey..I wasn’t alone.
So I got to work and created this plan I could follow that would set the foundation for “the next chapter of Me” - I laid it all out on post-its and notebook pages on my walls and living room floor. It was a real scene lol. But I thought you know what? this might be worth sharing.